Tuesday, August 17, 2021

Sometimes I Trip on How Happy We Could Be by Nichole Perkins

 

Welcome Back, Booklovers! I don't usually read a lot of non-fiction and especially not memoirs but from the time I saw this cover it was calling my name. Something about those nails and the pink dress and the dripping peach. I started following Nichole Perkins partially because I never saw anyone spell their name like that outside of my sister. But her tweets more often than not were coming across my timelines and I agreed with her takes. I didn't go in with any expectations and I think that's what made this such a wild ride.  I received a gifted finished copy in exchange for an honest review.


Nichole Perkins has lived a life! She doesn't hold back from the first essay Fast she explores her relationship and somewhat obsession with sex in a way I've never heard anyone be so blatantly honest before. I had to push some of my own judgement and bias aside just to read some of these essays. And she uses pop culture to mark different events over phases in her life. Like her love of Prince's music and the way he explores sex throughout his catalog. To her experience being a mistress and the awkward Aim and email conversations with the wife probing her for tips. 

She has an essay titled White Boys and explains where she tries to breakdown her obsession with dating them and realizing that the at the end of the day they're still men no different from other men. She also details in another essay an experience with a particular white man who set off all her red flags and pushed her boundaries in ways she's learned to never compromise over again. 

I loved the essay about Niles Crane and holding what's considered unrealistic expectations for your lover. Not to mention I agree with her that Fraiser is a good way to test your potential partner. If they can't get with the witty intellectual humor of that how than they probably won't understand me. And in My Kameelah-Ass List she reflects on what qualities she would like her ideal man to have.

But it's not just her love life and sexual exploits that make this memoir worth a read. I liked what she wrote about her family as well. She talks about the household she grew up in with a momma who was holding everything down while in an abusive relationship with her father. And her mother finding her own voice and sense of liberation and control through Janet Jackson. She writes about her relationship with her sister and the bonding moments over TV shows, music, and movies. There's the relationship with her brother where she's always been his keeper because he has special needs and she grew up learning to  stand up for him. How her favorite aunt tried to help her get away from the family dysfunction with book buying outings where she would indulge her love of romance.

As an HBCU grad she discusses the roles HBCU have played in her life. She grew up in Tennessee near 3 HBCUs so it was never a question whether she was going to one or not. It was choosing which one to go to and she opted for the further away Dillard to experience being on her own away from home. She gets into how freeing it was to be educated in an environment where her skin color didn't matter and the start difference when compared to her high school and grad school days. 

Even if you think you aren't like Nichole it's hard not to be able to relate to parts of her stories. Whether it be the questioning of Christianity because the church has let you down in the past or relating to the sentiment of not wanting to end up alone but also not wanting to compromise your ideals. This was a great read and even though non fiction isn't my usual go-to I highly suggest checking this out even if you just decide to read the essays as a slow read. 


1 comment:

  1. Sounds like an interesting memoir. The cover is very eye-catching.

    ReplyDelete